Did you work this week? Or did you opt to take time off since it is the new year and all that jazz. Working freelance, I have the option to work up to forty hours. This week, I was really torn. Do I work or not work.
New Year’s Eve, I decided to do six hours. New Year’s Day, none, zero, zilch. Time to take down Christmas while I had time (wait, I work from home, don’t I always have time? short answer… no) So I didn’t work-work. I did house-work. And yesterday? Argh… worked part of the day. So it’s time to play catch up.
I felt incredibly guilty for taking time off! I jumped out of the workforce rat-race for a reason, to take care of me. To focus on having more fun, read more books, drink more cafe mochas. But here I am feeling guilty, letting the old programming grab me. Get to work! I worked today. Tonight I felt good about it. Idk… the guilt is still bothering me about the time off. The voice in my head, But you only did 20 hours this week, think of all the money you might have made… Stop. Just stop.
It’s not always about the money. I sat in the sun. I read two books. I wrote. I set up my little art studio in a corner of the family room. I meditated and added songs to my playlist. I talked with friends. And tomorrow’s Friday. I’ll work tomorrow… at least part of the day.
I’m rambling… Did you work this week?
Wow what a ride! This life journey sure is a blast. Took a minute for me to get to this place of acceptance and yep, discovery. It’s a whole new world for me (I sound like Jasmine from Disney’s Aladdin… wait let me get my flying carpet out).
Didn’t think I had it in me to make such major life changes, especially being 63 and all. But who says we can’t do, learn, become more than this in the senior years of our lives? (and what’s considered senior nowadays?) No one. It’s our own perspective and the limits we set on ourselves.
Health challenges pushed me out of the comfort zone into the unknown. Oh no! Let me just say, this Pollyanna chicklet was freaking out. (and maybe sometimes I still do a little, for a few seconds when I wake up in the middle of the night and think what the he**)!
When I relax into the web of knowing, into trust of Spirit and All That Is, I do OK. So far, every need has been met. Every. Single. Thing. The right doctors, the right tests, a work-from-home job I can do in my p.j.’s. And not just any job, it’s a job that not only uses my writing and blogging skills, but allows me creative freedom (this is very cool). I work in the sunny south windows with my trusty sidekick Francis aka “Frankie” the long-haired chihuahua, sipping hot chocolate from Penzy’s (the best) and snacking on tasty Envy apple slices. Oh yah.
Let it Be (John Lennon), Be Here Now (Ram Dass), Que Sera Sera (Doris Day) and of course my favorite We Are More Than This… Trust without borders.