I’ve shared stories of being an intuitive, of experiences and visions, of knowing the path I’ve traveled was meant to bring me here writing for you. Each day when I sit to write I know the subject will appear on these pages just as they should.
With an open mind and heart, the greater Spirit moves me to the stack of journals, scraps of paper, drawings, poetry or sometimes I can see and hear it all inside so it rolls out on to the page. Today a flash appeared across my mind about relationships and family, that it might be the right subject for today.
I grabbed the art book I thought might hold some family events and dreams hoping to find a good piece. Trusting that all would be provided…that God, Spirit, All That Is knows what I need, opening the book, without intention the pages fell to a dream written, exactly the story I had in my mind just minutes earlier. I share this with you because it is meant to be…
September 2, 2011 – 1:20 a.m.
In between asleep and awake state I wrote:
“I woke from a dream of the most real and deepest sadness – I was divorcing my husband (in the dream there are no faces, it was all concepts and informational images). The reality or landscape of the dream involved the all families as representatives of the Whole trying to recreate that atmosphere of family, of connectedness after divorce. There were images of having similar toys in both homes, activities and routines trying to be recaptured, despite the very great divide of what had been a state of unity at one time – I did not sense great love, but instead a jagged tear into the “whole” family unit that would not, could not be duplicated or exist as same in two separate places, despite every effort and desire to make it so. This was heartbreakingingly sad.
In this dream there was a reference to the bodily illnesses, to the discomforts humanity feels as a direct result of the pain felt within, of experiencing such deep sadness, and a longing for any other feelings than what we are holding, I had an inner awakening. There was an intense and very profound recognition of what Spirit’s intention was and is for family and relationships and the very different reality manifesting here in the physical world.
This wasn’t just my family feeling such sadness, but all who have experienced these same life events. Others who have dismantled the family unit, divided husbands and wives, partners and partners, children left in fragmented existence, bewildered and insecure. The tear in families and relationships are events the Spirit Collective, the Whole that is all of us, mourn deeply.
I woke sitting up in bed crying real tears of sad, sad, sad. Tears and sadness for all affected…for mothers who work so hard to pick up the pieces, for fathers who try to recreate daily existence for themselves and their children, and for the children as individuals of the whole that exists here on Earth who suffer just as much. There is no escaping the very real rips and tears, no escape from the jagged broken lives that result as these relationships appear to amicably divide and fall from the unit of one complete dynamic.
Women and men pretend it doesn’t hurt, that they can’t feel – truly it is in numbness that we walk away from each other, husband from wife, wife from husband, partner from partner, with no conscious understanding that what has occurred is of such depth, so shattering, felt into the very SOUL of oneness, unaware that this connected unit will never again be capable of duplication.
As I write these words feeling the collective pain of families, of moms and dads, brothers and sisters, grandparents and all members that make up such an organism of strength, regardless of dysfunction or strife that may have existed, I weep giant tears of sadness for us all, for we have lost the ability to step out of independent righteousness. We have lost the ability to recognize, value and hold what was built out of great love, and not just Earthly love, but the love that is greater than this. We, you and I as human, we have allowed it to fall away, slip, drown, gone now, replaced by broken emptiness looking for a way to create what once was.”
These words rushed out in a hazy sleep state, feeling poured onto pages and pages, we as Spirit Collective looking for a voice. I remember writing furiously to rid myself of the pain of the Whole, the experience shook me for days and weeks. The house, the car, the job, the things you have are not who you are, they are not what make up your life. Instead it is the knowing smile between you and your significant other, the small hand of a child’s in yours, hugs from your mom or dad. Life consists of the bonds you’ve built with your husband, wife, partner, sons, daughters, aunts, uncles, cousins and those you consider family. Relationships are what matter, compassion for others is what matters, commitment to integrity and honesty is what matters.
For those of us who have walked the pain of divorce by choice or not, and stand here today, even if having created a new family environment, we know it is not the same. You know what it means when I use the words “rips and tears,” and “great divide.” Today, hold yourself and those around you in compassionate loving thought and forgiveness, Spirit Collective manifested on Earth remembering we aremore than this…
“Plant love in your garden. Kindness and sympathy flow from the heart of love, and human goodness follows divine realization at every turn in life’s road. Kindness and understanding are divine flames lighted from the altar of love, upon which burns the Light Eternal.
Go often into your garden. Sitting under the Tree of Life in cool, quiet communion, you will find fresh inspiration. God will go forth anew into creation through you. ” excerpted fromThis Thing Called You by Ernest Holmes