Tag Archives: intuition

Conscious Decision Making

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Life By Design nl

 

In February 2013, I had a lucid dream experience where I was consciously creating in the fabric of space and time. I was present before the canvas of matter creating images with thoughts and gestures. Since 2013, there have been many mornings when I’ve actually awakened with my arms and hands up in the air gesturing as if I am still creating from the “other” side of the fabric, spirit body on that side, physical body on this side. I know that with regular practice through meditation, lucid dreaming and conscious awareness, I can change day-to-day physical reality creating a more desirable, joy-filled life-path. As a mystic, I know that we are, we live, simultaneously as both source-self (spiritual being) and the physical manifested self, experiencing life. One might look at the physical self as an avatar of sorts, a vehicle that allows us to experience living out all sorts of adventures through a physical body! In short, we live between two worlds.

Naturally and unconsciously through choice, we have created daily experiences using thought and action. However, many of us are thinking, acting, and creating experiences running on “autopilot,” allowing life to occur, to just happen… and as a result, often left wondering why things aren’t quite the way we’d prefer. How do we create change?

The simple answer is to turn off the autopilot. To be mindful of thoughts and consequent actions. To take responsibility for, and examine the choices made… and then choose differently where possible. We can create a new reality, with conscious mindful thought, conscious mindful decisions, conscious mindful planning, and conscious mindful action.

Will daily life then be picture perfect? I can say from experience that it will not because some of the choices made up until now have resulted in the experiences each of us are currently living through. However, I can say it will be better and that circumstances can be changed. Life is better because you will have become fully engaged. Daily life events are no longer just happening to you because you will have become a conscious, mindful, active, participant in its creation.

How to start? Over the next couple of months, each week I will introduce a set of self-exploration exercises to assist in becoming mindful of current life situations, where your focus has been, where it’s at today, how to make time for self-nurturing, and how to manage time and plan mindfully. These simple no-nonsense self-discovery activities are meant to be used over and over as you cycle through decisions, discover new facets of self, choose goals and take steps toward change. These activities have been used in workshops for over twenty years, basic, tried and true.  They are focused, personal, and will nudge you toward self-nurturing, as well as personal and spiritual growth. Next week: Module One – “Primary Caretakers.”

Never Broken, She Persisted

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Centered

I am a vivid dreamer, able to fill dream journals with pages and pages of dreams, many about myself, sometimes about others, and still other dream stories are about the country or world events.  When I have a particular dilemma or question about life, I will write it in my dream journal and wait for an answer.

Recently without prompting or questions, I dreamt that I was working with a team of people creating life experiences for a woman.  The events were meant to challenge her in every way, experience after experience, one after another, sometimes more than one occurring on top of another.  Layer after layer, one upon another, complex and highly intense. Each experience meant to peel and pull, to break away the characteristics of the woman… Until she was clean… Until she was clear and transparent… Ready to begin again.

The woman was never broken, instead she persisted.  She allowed and accepted.  She went through the experiences one after another, layer upon layer from the beginning to the now. Throughout the peeling and pulling breaking down process she came to be free… Free from the burdens each experience had brought forth in memories.

Now, she appeared before us all like calm waters, crystal-clear and accepting… Childlike in that she was now a vessel for what newness would begin. As I rose from the dream feeling indifferent, I thought it was just a dream about a woman.  But it wasn’t about just a woman.  I realized it was me.  I am this woman.  I am naked, clean, soul stripped bare, transparent, empty and calm, ready for the new beginnings that lay ahead.

Yes, I am — Let it begin.

And All Is Well

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earth-angel-josephine-wall

Earth Angel by Josephine Wall

 

A member of the community I work for passed away last week. It’s a small community where each member has known the other for years and years… Close-knit and interwoven, there is a hole now where she once was. Ever faithful, loving and kind, she is missed by all.

Living consciously as both Spirit and physical being, I know with conviction that only her body is gone. She lives on, a being unique in character who now flows as one with Spirit, God, all-encompassing Love. My intuitive and clairaudient gifts kicked in the morning she died.  I was hanging laundry and sensed she had passed. I wondered if I should call my colleagues. I didn’t, instead I left to run errands. Jumping out of the car at the store I felt her with me and an encompassing, exuberant joy, “Tell them I am pain-free and happy,” I heard inwardly.  No way, I thought back to her. I’m emotionally involved in this. I’m not saying a word. With inner speak I said, “I’ll tell you what, if you really have something you’d like me to pass on, provide a dream, something someone will get and understand.”

That evening I saw a movie with a friend, cleaned up the kitchen and hit the pillows early. And yes, my request was provided. In the dream, I found myself hovering over the chapel where the wake and funeral were taking place for the woman who had died. In flowing energy form, I was with the woman who had died and a group of others who were accompanying us. There was no time so all seemed to be happening at once, the preparations, wake and funeral, a very odd concept when not in the dream or meditative state.

The wake was beautiful and wonderfully attended and the funeral very nicely done. Everything ran very smoothly. As we observed there were thoughts exchanged, speech was not necessary, “You see all is well,”  I was told. Then, I was instructed to let someone in particular know that she needn’t be anxious to get the wake and funeral details done immediately, that she should complete the other things needing attention first and then get to the business of the wake and funeral. Because you see, “it was all going to be fine anyway so what was the use of worrying, why bother fretting over it?”

I lingered with the group for what seemed like a long time and was shown other events that would unfold over the next short period of time. And drat! Those are the pieces I wanted to remember and couldn’t. I brought back only the most vivid of  images and knew I had to pass on the message. I sent a quick text to the intended party and went about getting the work day started. Once I arrived at the office and was settled in, I checked e-mail and sure enough, there was a notice letting us know she had passed away the morning of the previous day.

Like everyone else I am sad she’s no longer with us, but I know with every ounce of my being that she lives on. What stays with me most from the time in the dream state with these loving souls are the moments of great joy and the desire to reassure the living that “all is well and not to fret.”   My spiritual experiences and life journey have brought me to this dual existence where physical and spiritual energy operate simultaneously.  I feel blessed and fortunate to have been provided with such gifts. What dear reader would help you to know that we are more than this?”

“We are participants in a vast communion of being, and if we open ourselves to its guidance, we can learn anew how to live in this great and gracious community of truth.” ~ Parker Palmer

Connection and Reconnection

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For years people have asked if I can teach them to read auras, perform intuitive readings, consciously dream and to connect with Spirit. My response? Of course, all it takes is a willingness to walk in Spirit and a commitment to meditative practice.

For me learning to turn inward to meditate was more an evolutionary process than a conscious endeavor. The big picture went unrecognized while continuously unfolding. Reflecting on the journey it’s easy to see that life experiences from childhood to present have brought me here. However while traveling the years it never occurred to me to see any type of end result. My focus was more on moving from one moment to the next just trying to keep up. I don’t believe I was meant to see what was coming. Instead this was a blossoming work in process, a necessity where I was to live only as physical with complete immersion in marrying, divorcing, completing college, becoming a single mother, working and ultimately growing spiritually.  I experienced these things in order to learn and relate to others, in order to write for you dear reader. How else might I understand what it means to struggle, to worry, to feel love, pain, joy, sorrow, to build courage and strength?

As I continue meditative practices and living mindfully, the abilities and skills continue to increase in strength as well as the conscious connection with Spirit Collective. This is a time filled with anticipation and excitement for whatever communication or lesson may appear next. Every once in a while there’s a quiet spell. When it gets too quiet, when nothing appears I begin to feel a deep longing for connection. Author John O’Donohue speaks to this longing saying that “our persistent, if vague longing is a divine urgency for the Creator and the created to become one again.” That burning desire keeps me searching, it keeps me learning, it keeps me moving toward Spirit, toward the Whole. It is divine urgency leading me to connection and reconnection repeatedly.

Today contemplating the long weeks of quiet just passed, I realize I’m standing in the midst of a new phase of growth. Unexpected events and people have moved into place and with them opportunity. A divine and graced orchestration I wait now for the Creator to draw me into what’s prepared. Join me. If the willingness is there, if you’re interested and feel the urgency, write, let’s talk and find time to sit together in quiet communication with the Creator. We are more than this…

“Earth’s crammed with heaven. And every common bush is afire with God; But only he who sees takes off his shoes, the rest sit around it and pluck blackberries.” ~ Elizabeth Barrett Browing

Making Choices

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by Salvador Dali

 

While preparing for meditation this morning I came across this lovely contemplative writing that I share with you today. Be mindful dear reader.

“After a long, hard climb up the mountain, the spiritual seekers found themselves in front of the great teacher. Bowing, they asked the question that had been burning inside them for so long:

‘How do we become wise O Master?’

There was a long pause until the teacher emerged from his meditation. Finally, the reply came, ‘Good choices.’

‘But how do we learn to make good choices?’

“From experience,’ responded the wise teacher.

‘And how do we acquire such experience?’ They inquired.

‘Bad choices,’ smiled the teacher.

Watch your thoughts, they become your words. Watch your words they become actions. Watch your actions, they become habits. Watch your habits, they become character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.

Be mindful of what you think, how you speak, and what you do.”

We are more than this…

Circle of One

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I had an amazing experience yesterday during meditation. An event felt with such clarity I share it in the hope that you also will take time to sit quietly in order to discover more about yourself, connection with Spirit and about living.

After imaging through a series of colors I had reached a state of quiet calm.  There I saw a circle of individuals around me…one of the individuals was in fact me. “I” was observing my physical self yet simultaneously existing as both the observer and the person being observed. I, as physical self, felt a wave of compassion as the circle observed my life experiences and saw the child behind the woman who had been raised in a home with an alcoholic parent. Both the child and woman carried wounds in the form of fragility and sadness.

What triggered this experience while in meditation was the country song “Blown Away,” done by Carrie Underwood. I’ve been hearing this frequently on the radio. It’s the story of a young girl growing up with an alcoholic father. The video for the song shows a storm approaching with tornado sirens blaring. After watching the music video I found there was a resurfacing of the memories and emotional wounds carried as a child. It is not that I have buried the experiences, they rise and fall as they will, I accept, observe and then let them go. Watch the video for yourself, it’s quite powerful (use the back button to return to this Blog):

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pJgoHgpsb9I

As the meditation continued to unfold with my existing in duality, the Circle of One spoke in a union of voices, “Be compassionate toward your self. Give your self comfort. Respect and love the child who experienced what are now memories carried as an adult woman.” They reached out in waves of compassion, holding me close, all the while illustrating how here in the physical I must also consciously embrace the child and now woman in loving care rather than just putting the surfaced memories aside. What a profound experience.

At the same time there were images and words requesting I share this with you dear readers, that I encourage you to find the time to sit quietly and connect with the Spirit Collective, with the Circle of One. Hold yourself and the memories that rise to the surface in loving care and compassion. The entire experience spoke to how we are hard on ourselves, driven to let the past go in order to move forward. Embrace your memories and your self with compassion and love, we are very obviously not alone in this endeavor. We are more than this…

“Let your mind start a journey thru a strange new world. Leave all thoughts of the world you knew before. Let your soul take you where you long to be…Close your eyes let your spirit start to soar, and you’ll live as you’ve never lived before.” ~ Erich Fromm

Our Divine Connection

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Share your heart. Practicing love and acceptance of others is the most effective way to demonstrate living Spirit and the infinite compassion of Grace. Fast-paced days, hectic schedules, rushing to the next place, e-mails, voice mails, text messages, where is your heart as you move about through the sea of must do’s?

How do I share my heart and practice love? After meditation and prayer, I jot down insights, some of which are for others who have requested information. Making breakfast there’s time to gab with my son. While we eat he shows me his favorite morning videos or the political announcements he considers absurd. It’s a highlight of my day, we share laughter. During the drive to school we listen to new music he’s downloaded or created himself. It’s a special time for us so I don’t answer my cell phone or respond to texts. It’s just us. We sit in appreciation and acceptance of each other, me for his music and him for my lame jokes.

Once I’m at the office, I find out how people are doing. Winding through the hall a hey there and what’s up goes out to everyone on the hallways. If someone wants or needs to talk, I listen and provide a hug when called for, or get a needed hug myself. Since I’m usually early, this does not bite into work time. Throughout the day, I make an effort to stop what I’m doing to listen to the person who has walked in my door to talk about a work related or personal topic. I give them my full attention turning away from my computer or paper-filled desk.

Really it all comes down to being mindful of actions. By paying attention to what’s in front of you, not only are you exhibiting patience, but you are also modeling acceptance and love. This hasn’t always come easily for me. It’s meant having to practice patience and the realization that the needs of others are just as important as my own, primarily because we are all one. We are all part of the Whole. It’s meant seeing with different eyes, with the eyes of loving Spirit. Until I felt a complete connection with something greater than myself sharing my heart and living love was more work than a way of life.

In February of this year I had a profound mystical experience that brought that deeper connection to reality. During meditation, completely aware of my whereabouts, I found myself surrounded by others. I found myself to be one of many personalities. We, each of us were different in characteristics, yet we still existed as one, connected, intertwined energies with no means, method or desire to be separate. Collectively it felt like great love, the most encompassing love, which was, which is our true state of being. In this Spirit state, we are Creators. I exist as my Creator, or rather I am the Creator of my “self,” the body manifest here on Earth. I am, you are exactly as you exist physically on Earth. You, all of your character traits, your personality, this is what you are there, only much greater. You are Love. There is no strife, no pain, no opposites.

In this place, all of character or personalities were clothed in fluid pastel colored hues. The colors or “people” I experienced were many, vivid, alive, moving and flowing, and the air alive with excited conversation. Together we were planning paths and life events. There was a joyful sense of knowing, of being connected in Love. During that time, I was comfortably aware that earthly reality provides the opportunity for individualization, individual creativity and autonomy, something we cannot experience as part of the Spirit Collective. I saw with clarity that even at the core of the individualization experienced on earth, there is a creative story and interweaving of all personalities that is agreed upon in the purest form.

Having been graced with such a powerful experience, knowing that we are all connected with each other in a greater divine manner, this gift is what allows me to practice patience and forgiveness, to love unconditionally, to accept with compassion, because in the end we are each a part of the other. We are one. You are my sister, my brother and I yours. So whatever we do or say to each other, however we behave, ultimately this is how we are treating ourselves. Share your heart. Practice patience, love and kindness. We are more than this…

“From the moment you came into this world, a ladder was placed in front of you, that you might transcend it. From earth, you became plant,  from plant, you became animal, afterwards, you became a human being endowed with knowledge, intellect and faith. Behold the body, born of dust, how perfect it has become. Why should you fear its end? Where were you ever made less by dying? When you pass beyond this human form no doubt you will become an angel and soar through the heavens, but don’t stop there, even heavenly bodies grow old. Pass again from the heavenly realm and plunge, plunge into the vast ocean of consciousness, let the drop of water that is you become a hundred mighty seas. But do not think that the drop alone becomes the ocean. The ocean too becomes the drop.”

 – Rumi